An Intern's Life in the Accidental Magic Reversal Squad
written by Leona Atherton
I am a Ministry of Magic intern in the Accidental Magic Reversal Squad in London. I heard stories growing up of how wizards and witches are prone to getting themselves in trouble no matter the age. Well, turns out the stories are more or less true. I have dealt with a 65 year old wizard who somehow managed to get his trousers stuck in a floo network chimney, and it caused quite a backup in the system. We had witches and wizards stumbling out of the fireplace around his failing arms (he was none too happy to be stuck), but we finally set it all right. That was my first day.
Last Updated
05/31/21
Chapters
2
Reads
1,299
First Day at the Ministry: Senators and Floo Network Disasters
Chapter 1
I am a Ministry of Magic intern in the Accidental Magic Reversal Squad in London. To provide some background, the AMR is a division of the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes responsible for reversing the effects of magical mishaps caused by inexperienced witches and wizards, those who have not learned to control their magic, or those who may not be very skilled (aka those who might not want to control their magic).
I heard stories growing up of how wizards and witches are prone to getting themselves in trouble no matter the age. Well, turns out the stories are more or less true.
I met Mr. Reynold Fitz-William, a wizened wizard of 65 years, when his trousers got stuck in one of the Ministry's floo network fireplaces. It was my first day as an intern for the AMR Squad, and I had succeeded in being four unfortunate minutes late. I had just donned my new AMR Dept. badge to the side pocket of my coat, which Mr. Fitz-William apparently saw as I ran past his fireplace.
"Hey, AMR!" I heard over the din of the 8 o'clock bustle, which I didn't stop for because someone is always yelling for someone else in the ministry. I ignored it until he yelled even louder, "Atherton! Leona Atherton!" This was less like a command and more a forceful cry for help. I stopped in my tracks.
A grey and brown-haired wizard with slightly askew spectacles was calling my name from a fireplace ten or twenty feet back down the Atrium. I hesitated at the clock tower in front of me reading 8:05, and I hurried to the man in the fireplace. It was immediately apparent that his trousers had gotten stuck (thus, his reason for yelling for a member of AMR). What he failed to note was that I was not a full member or even an official intern as of 8:05 that Monday morning. I hadn't even met my boss, been assigned a mentor, or gotten an assignment yet. I looked at his half bent stature and half appeared coat and pants' seat, and in a confident voice, I began,
"Good morning, Mr. emm..."
"Fitz-William." The wizard filled in.
"Ah, Fitz-William. I assume you need some help?" I finished weakly.
He grunted. "Hmph. Of course I need your blasted help. It says AMR on your badge there, so I assume you are the best person to help me." A middle aged wizard tumbled into the fireplace below one of Fitz-William's waving arms (he was still trying to un-stick himself from the fireplace). Three seconds and a loud shriek later, a well-dressed witch stumbled into view and promptly tripped over the wizard who had collapsed onto the floor. I grimaced. The two awkwardly helped each other up and walked away down the Atrium scouring at me as they did so. My confidence faltered somewhat.
"I am sure we can help you with this sir, just let me call one of my colleagues..."
My well-worn Ravenclaw scarf slipped off of one shoulder as I looked frantically for another AMR badge to appear. I found one attached to the shirt of a young woman, not much older than I, hurrying over to the fireplace I stood in front of and Reynold Fitz-William was attached to.
"What seems to be the trouble?" She said in a sharp, clear voice. Her hair was pulled back into a neat bun on the nape of her neck. She wore a fashionable blouse, a grey blazer and matching pencil skirt, black polished heels, and she even was wearing panty hose if I could see correctly. I visibly sunk deeper into my hand-me-down coat and sweater. I pulled my scarf back onto my shoulders.
"Well, Lindsey, if you can't tell, I'm stuck. Get me out of this blasted thing!"
"Of course, Senator Fitz-William." She pointed her wand at the trapped coat and trouser leg, or rather in the space where they ought to be. I never caught the spell she used, but out Senator Fitz-William flew into a curled position at my feet. He gruffly uncurled himself, brushed the floo powder reside from his clothes, and stood.
"Nice to make your acquaintance, Senator." I said meekly.
"Hmph. Uh huh." He paused and turned back to me. "Just checking; it is Atherton isn't it?" He asked, looking at my badge.
"Umm, yes sir... senator." The Senator turned to the polished woman on my right.
"Well, it seems thanks are in order, Miss Walker. It's nice to see your youthful, smiling face once in a while." Lindsey gave him a cool smile and replaced an invisible stray hair.
"My pleasure. But we must stop meeting like this."
"Too much trouble the blasted floo network is anyway, I say." He said as an answer. Senator Fitz-William began walking down the Atrium towards the interior of the building and called over his shoulder, "Must get to work, Atherton. Musn't be late on your first day!"
I quickly turned to Lindsey. "How did he-?"
Her lips gave away only a hint of a smile. "Auror."
"Ah." I couldn't believe he read my mind! Oh well, it was apparent enough that I was frazzled and nervous and didn't belong in the walls of the Ministry. Not yet, but that would change. Lindsey cleared her throat, and I focused again on the well-dressed AMR member in front of me.
"That was Senator Fitz-William, a member of the International Confederation of Wizards. He has held his seat for the last ten years." She stepped closer and lowered her voice to a whisper. "This happens all the time. He's cranky, but you'll get used to it." She then briskly turned and hurried into the Ministry; we entered an elevator bound for the third floor, which houses the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes and my new home, the AMR.
"A senator who routinely gets stuck in fireplaces..." I said thoughtfully as the doors opened on the third level.
Lindsey Walker smiled as she stepped forward and motioned for me to follow, "Oh, you don't know the half of it."
I heard stories growing up of how wizards and witches are prone to getting themselves in trouble no matter the age. Well, turns out the stories are more or less true.
I met Mr. Reynold Fitz-William, a wizened wizard of 65 years, when his trousers got stuck in one of the Ministry's floo network fireplaces. It was my first day as an intern for the AMR Squad, and I had succeeded in being four unfortunate minutes late. I had just donned my new AMR Dept. badge to the side pocket of my coat, which Mr. Fitz-William apparently saw as I ran past his fireplace.
"Hey, AMR!" I heard over the din of the 8 o'clock bustle, which I didn't stop for because someone is always yelling for someone else in the ministry. I ignored it until he yelled even louder, "Atherton! Leona Atherton!" This was less like a command and more a forceful cry for help. I stopped in my tracks.
A grey and brown-haired wizard with slightly askew spectacles was calling my name from a fireplace ten or twenty feet back down the Atrium. I hesitated at the clock tower in front of me reading 8:05, and I hurried to the man in the fireplace. It was immediately apparent that his trousers had gotten stuck (thus, his reason for yelling for a member of AMR). What he failed to note was that I was not a full member or even an official intern as of 8:05 that Monday morning. I hadn't even met my boss, been assigned a mentor, or gotten an assignment yet. I looked at his half bent stature and half appeared coat and pants' seat, and in a confident voice, I began,
"Good morning, Mr. emm..."
"Fitz-William." The wizard filled in.
"Ah, Fitz-William. I assume you need some help?" I finished weakly.
He grunted. "Hmph. Of course I need your blasted help. It says AMR on your badge there, so I assume you are the best person to help me." A middle aged wizard tumbled into the fireplace below one of Fitz-William's waving arms (he was still trying to un-stick himself from the fireplace). Three seconds and a loud shriek later, a well-dressed witch stumbled into view and promptly tripped over the wizard who had collapsed onto the floor. I grimaced. The two awkwardly helped each other up and walked away down the Atrium scouring at me as they did so. My confidence faltered somewhat.
"I am sure we can help you with this sir, just let me call one of my colleagues..."
My well-worn Ravenclaw scarf slipped off of one shoulder as I looked frantically for another AMR badge to appear. I found one attached to the shirt of a young woman, not much older than I, hurrying over to the fireplace I stood in front of and Reynold Fitz-William was attached to.
"What seems to be the trouble?" She said in a sharp, clear voice. Her hair was pulled back into a neat bun on the nape of her neck. She wore a fashionable blouse, a grey blazer and matching pencil skirt, black polished heels, and she even was wearing panty hose if I could see correctly. I visibly sunk deeper into my hand-me-down coat and sweater. I pulled my scarf back onto my shoulders.
"Well, Lindsey, if you can't tell, I'm stuck. Get me out of this blasted thing!"
"Of course, Senator Fitz-William." She pointed her wand at the trapped coat and trouser leg, or rather in the space where they ought to be. I never caught the spell she used, but out Senator Fitz-William flew into a curled position at my feet. He gruffly uncurled himself, brushed the floo powder reside from his clothes, and stood.
"Nice to make your acquaintance, Senator." I said meekly.
"Hmph. Uh huh." He paused and turned back to me. "Just checking; it is Atherton isn't it?" He asked, looking at my badge.
"Umm, yes sir... senator." The Senator turned to the polished woman on my right.
"Well, it seems thanks are in order, Miss Walker. It's nice to see your youthful, smiling face once in a while." Lindsey gave him a cool smile and replaced an invisible stray hair.
"My pleasure. But we must stop meeting like this."
"Too much trouble the blasted floo network is anyway, I say." He said as an answer. Senator Fitz-William began walking down the Atrium towards the interior of the building and called over his shoulder, "Must get to work, Atherton. Musn't be late on your first day!"
I quickly turned to Lindsey. "How did he-?"
Her lips gave away only a hint of a smile. "Auror."
"Ah." I couldn't believe he read my mind! Oh well, it was apparent enough that I was frazzled and nervous and didn't belong in the walls of the Ministry. Not yet, but that would change. Lindsey cleared her throat, and I focused again on the well-dressed AMR member in front of me.
"That was Senator Fitz-William, a member of the International Confederation of Wizards. He has held his seat for the last ten years." She stepped closer and lowered her voice to a whisper. "This happens all the time. He's cranky, but you'll get used to it." She then briskly turned and hurried into the Ministry; we entered an elevator bound for the third floor, which houses the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes and my new home, the AMR.
"A senator who routinely gets stuck in fireplaces..." I said thoughtfully as the doors opened on the third level.
Lindsey Walker smiled as she stepped forward and motioned for me to follow, "Oh, you don't know the half of it."
