Jubilant Jokes

Why did the Slytherin get detention after a Transfiguration class?
He kept trying to “snake” his way out of doing his homework.

What’s a wizard’s least favourite spell to have cast on them in the morning?
“Awaken!” But if they sleep through that, they’ll get “Accio’d” right out of bed.

Why don’t broomsticks make good pets?
Because they always sweep things under the rug.

How did the Hufflepuff brew their own Felix Felicis?
They accidentally poured an entire cauldron of optimism into it. Every sip made people do cartwheels down the corridor.

Why did the enchanted quill break up with the ink bottle?
Because it said, “You’re too possessive!”

What do ghosts do for fun in the library?
They check out all the haunted books and scare the life out of the footnotes.

Why did the Gryffindor run from a one-way duel?
They heard it was a spell for “binding loyalty.”

How do you know if a centaur’s lying?
If he says he’s “going to hoof it,” he’s probably cantering away from his responsibilities.

Why did the wizard bring a cauldron to the family picnic?
Because he thought it was a “potluck”!

What did the boggart say to the Defence Against the Dark Arts professor?
“You’re teaching me to face my fears!”