DISCLAIMER: SPOILERS!

Hmm… let me guess, you’ve never seen this chapter before in any of Hogwarts Monthly News’ issues? Well, don’t worry, this is a new addition to our monthly issue! I, Hazel Emory Antler, will be rewriting a fairy tale each month, any fairy tale or story whatsoever. This could be for many reasons: I might think the story’s too boring, maybe it needs some lightening up, or perhaps it’s the best story EVER but could be set in another light to mix things up. But here’s another reason: you know how Disney Princesses are (most of the time) saved by “heroic” and “handsome” princes in the stories?

Well, that’s actually sexist. It portrays women as weaklings who aren’t even intelligent or strong.

Women and girls are smart, emotionally intelligent, and strong. We are perfectly capable of everything men are capable of. We can save ourselves if we want to. And in fairy-tales we are portrayed as vulnerable, for SOME REASON. And doesn’t it just seem a little too weird that random princes just hop along, kiss someone and then marry them like one day later? And they think that they can get away with it as well… Oh, don’t you dare! >: (

Not only that, but there is pedophilia in the original story of “Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs” since Snow White was 14 while Prince Charming was allegedly 31.

OK, I spoiled it above. This month’s chapter will be about the well-known fairy tale, “Snow White And The Seven Dwarves.” I shall first give you a summary of the original story.

There was once a king and queen who got a daughter named “Snow White.” Unfortunately, the kind queen died not too long after Snow White’s birth. The king remarried a woman who was beautiful but cruel and vain at the same time. She looked into the Magic Mirror, and it told her that Snow White was more beautiful than her. Jealous of her stepdaughter’s beauty, she ordered a huntsman to kill her in a forest, but he let her go, and she went to live with seven dwarfs. The Evil Queen found out that Snow White was still alive and, disguised as an old hag, went to give her a poisonous apple to eat. Snow White accepted it and dropped into an everlasting slumber. A prince kisses her, and they are married, with a happy ending.

Now, witches and wizards. Here’s MY version of the story:

SNOW WHITE AND THE EVIL QUEEN

Once upon a time, there was a lovely king and queen who ruled over a kingdom. They were adored by people wide and far for their kindness and generosity. However, their hearts were troubled. Yes, they seemed exuberant, but they had a desire - a desire to have a child, yet they didn’t have one.

It was a crispy, cold day and the queen was doing some needlework besides an open window, gazing out at the fallen snow, her mind distant from her needlework. A squirrel popped out of nowhere, and shattered her gaze. She was so surprised that she accidentally pricked her finger. She looked at the snow outside, then back down to her finger that was now dripping ruby-red droplets.

“Oh, how I wish I had a daughter with skin as white as snow, lips as red as blood, and hair as black as ebony.” She whispered to herself, before sighing.

Soon after that, the heavens granted the king and queen’s wish - they were given a daughter, the most beautiful the kingdom had ever seen, with skin as white as snow, lips as red as blood, and hair black as ebony just like the queen had wished. The king and queen put up a vote for the name of their daughter, and after a couple of days, they found the perfect name for her: Snow White.

Sadly, the queen didn’t manage to live for long as a year after Snow White’s birth she mysteriously disappeared into the Dark Forest and never came back out again.

A hooded woman had, instead, came out of the forest with the queen’s body in her arms. She told them how she had found the queen in the forest a day earlier. She told them how when she found the queen, she had rips and tears in her clothes and how there was blood stained all over her dress.

“I tried to do everything I could… But I couldn’t do anything,” the hooded woman said gravely, bowing her head down as if acknowledging the former queen’s existence. Snow White had been weeping over her mother’s body, but looked over her shoulder at the hooded woman's bowed face. Yes, her lips were in a serious position, but her eyes… they were twinkling with delight. A smile flitted across the woman’s face… or… had Snow White imagined it?

Once everyone got back to the kingdom, the hooded woman was called a hero. The king asked her if she wanted anything, anything at all, and all she said was that she wanted to have a little chat with him.

“After all…” she said in a grave voice, “we are all very sad… she was your wife…”

The next day, the king announced that he and the hooded women were going to be married. The kingdom was shocked - he had loved the former queen! Even though the new queen was a hero, he surely hadn’t just quickly made the choice of marrying her. When the marriage was announced, the hooded woman lifted down her hood and looked down upon the kingdom, silencing them with her looks. She was beautiful, surely the most beautiful woman the kingdom had ever seen. Although… There was also Snow White.

15 years later, when Snow White was a teenager, her stepmother stepped into her own royal suite. Her gaze fell upon the mirror on the wall, and she started to walk towards it, admiring her own beauty as she did so. Slowly, she came to a stop and said, in her elegant, mellow, and commanding voice:

“Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who’s the fairest of them all?”

The mirror replied:

“You are fair, my dear queen. But there’s another, more beautiful than anyone’s ever seen.”

The queen’s eye twitched. But she kept calm. She knew she could have anyone demolished if she wanted - the king was too madly in love with her.

“And who is this, ah, what’s the word? Oh, who is this beautiful lady?”

The queen waited for an answer, not expecting the one returned.

“She has skin as white as snow, lips as red as blood, and hair as black as ebony. It is your stepdaughter, Snow White, who is the fairest of them all.”

The queen screamed in rage. She was jealous, but then again, that would be an understatement. Luckily, no one in the castle heard her because of the silencing magic she had placed upon the royal suite.

“I shall order Tim the huntsman to take her to the Dark Forest and murder her! He shall bring back her heart as proof…”

And the queen swept out of the room, her cloak billowing behind her, searching for the young huntsman who was only a year older than Snow White, and her only friend, although the Evil Queen didn’t know it.

In the queen’s cabinet hid Snow White. She had been listening to this all along, her heartbeat pounding with every second that passed. And now her heart was about to burst out of her chest.

You see, the reason that Snow White had been stuck in that cabinet was because of the Evil Queen. Ever since Snow White’s mother’s death, she had ordered Snow White to clean her royal suite every single day since she was 1. Yes, 1! Snow White had accepted, just to help her stepmother out and perhaps get a little closer to her. But none of her sweetness worked - the Evil Queen just abused her power over her stepdaughter and forced her to do extra work without a break.

Snow White had been cleaning when she had heard the Evil Queen in the corridors. To not upset her mother, even though she hadn’t been doing anything wrong, she had hid in the cabinet and listened to all of this.

Luckily for Snow White, she was smart. Possibly the most quick-witted girl in the kingdom. She knew that Tim would never harm her, no matter what. So when he asked her to go to the Dark Forest with him for a little adventure, she agreed obligingly and followed him on a trail.

As soon as they reached the centre of the forest, he fell to his knees, unable to keep up the act any longer. He told her everything the Evil Queen had asked him to do, and Snow White told him how she already knew as she had eavesdropped on the Evil Queen.

“Don’t worry, Tim; from here I shall take my own path in this disastrous world. Go and take a boar’s heart to the queen - she will believe that it is mine. After all, according to her, I’m a boar. Bye, bye, Tim. I’m afraid that I’ll never see you again, but I must go on,” said the young girl with sadness in her voice.

They embraced each other before Tim went off to hunt a boar and Snow White followed the trail.

Snow White arrived at a little abandoned cottage. There, she found a family of talking squirrels, who listened to her pleas for shelter. They let her in and treated her like a sister. From that day on, she lived there and was as happy as could be.

Tim, on the other hand, had gone back to the Evil Queen with the boar’s heart. He knew he didn’t have long to live in the palace once the queen realised that Snow White was alive. He planned to flee soon, before he was murdered for betrayal.

A couple of days later the queen asked her magic mirror the same question as when Snow White had been spying on her:

“Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who’s the fairest of them all?”

The queen smirked, her vanity overpowering her. She knew that she was the fairest of them all.

“You might be fair, queen, that is true, but there is one who’s fairer than you.”

The queen’s face flickered for a second. For a moment, it had seemed like there was a different, more ugly face under there.

“Well, I’ll just take her out too,” thought the Evil Queen to herself. “Who is this fair lady?”

“She has skin as white as snow, lips as red as blood, and hair as black as ebony. She resides in the Dark Forest with a family of squirrels in an abandoned cottage. This beautiful lady is none other than -” Uttered the mirror with a smirk on its face.

The mirror’s face shattered as the Evil Queen hurled a vase at it.

“Thanks for telling me, mirror,” she hissed dangerously like a serpent about to strike. “You just don’t have to give me details about her beauty.”

“The huntsman must’ve lied to me. Snow White is alive, and probably well-fed and happy too! There’s only one thing left to do - I must murder her! And… the huntsman as well, but I’ll save him for dessert. The main course tonight, darling… is Snow White.” The Evil Queen thought to herself. She lifted the gigantic mirror from the wall and went through a secret trapdoor and into her secret chambers.

There were shelves lining every single wall, and potions upon potions on them. This queen wasn’t just an Evil Queen - she was a dark witch. Most of her potions were poisonous, and there were gruesome ingredients in jars upon the walls.

She took an ordinary apple from a shelf covered with cobwebs and threw it into her cauldron forcefully as her anger and insanity took over her. She next shoved in spider legs, as well as frog legs and goat hearts. She threw in other herbs.

In the end, the Evil Queen pulled out a shiny apple from the cauldron. It looked new, fresh, and sweet - ANYONE would eat it. However, it was deadly poisonous, and one bite could kill anyone in a second.

The Evil Queen’s madness took away her beauty; her face flickered like it once had before, and underneath her perfect lips, eyes and nose was an ugly face covered with warts, wrinkly skin and attempted makeup. The queen shrank into a hunched hag with the same hood she had worn 15 years ago when she had come out of the Dark Forest bearing the former queen’s body.

The insane queen travelled deep inside the Dark Forest before she managed to find the cottage. Snow White was home alone as the squirrels were out collecting acorns and berries.

The seemingly old hag knocked on the door. As soon as Snow White opened the door, she recognised the Evil Queen. She recognised the fake smile AND the hood she had worn so many years before. Yet, she let her in, a plan forming and a fake smile of her own.

“I’ve come here for a drink, please, I’m thirsty,” croaked out the hag. “Perhaps I can give you my fresh apple after?”

“Of course,” said Snow White, pretending to be busy bustling around the kitchen. What she was actually doing was removing one of the special herbs from her shelves - the slumber herb. She sprinkled a little into a glass of juice. She then got another glass of juice.

She went back to the living room and kept the poisonous glass for herself and gave the safe one to the witch. Now, she didn’t do this by accident, she did this on purpose. When Snow White turned away, the hag swiftly switched the glasses, as she believed that Snow White had done something to hers, as innocent as she looked.

The two started to sip their drinks, and Snow White noticed that the herb wasn’t working on the Evil Queen, and she panicked. Once the juice was finished, the hag said slyly, “now, dear, surely you would like a bite of my delicious apple? Come on now, don’t be shy…”

“No thank you, I’m full from the juice,” Snow White protested. But the Evil Queen was done playing games.

“EAT!” She roared, stuffing the apple in Snow White’s mouth. Snow White looked dumbfounded, before collapsing on the floor. The Evil Queen roared with triumph - at last she had conquered the stupid Snow White.

But there was one thing the Evil Queen didn’t know - Snow White was still alive! Yes, the Evil Queen had stuffed the apple into Snow White’s mouth, but Snow White hadn’t actually taken a bite! As soon as the Evil Queen left out of the front door, Snow White spat the apple out and got to her feet, dusting herself off.

In the little time that she had been living with the squirrels, Snow White had learnt kung fu from the smallest squirrel, Tofu. Snow White, wearing her old overalls, slammed the door open. She didn’t care that the Evil Queen was standing in front of her, disguised as a hag. Or rather - she had always been a hag. She was just disguised as a queen.

The hag smiled devilishly, but Snow White was prepared. She aimed a blow at the hag’s stomach, although she missed. The second time she hit her mark, and the Evil Queen coughed, rasping and wheezing.

Snow White found a particularly sharp sword from Tofu’s private part of the cottage and faced the Evil Queen with a newfound sparkle in her eye.

“This is the end of you,” Snow White said, hatred burning in every one of her blood cells. She was about to stab the sword into the queen’s heart when the queen cried out, “STOP!”

“Dear, dear,” the queen said in a sudden slippery and sweet voice. “I can’t believe this… mother against daughter!”

“You’re not my mother!” cried Snow White in rage.

“But don’t you want to know what happened to her? What I did that day? What I placed upon your father? If so, put that sword down.” The queen was said with a wicked smile growing on her face.

Snow White wanted to murder her, she really did, but at the same time, she was curious. She dropped the sword to her side.

“I was a dark witch, my dear - and an ugly one too. All the other witches were praised for their beauty, while I was banned from every meeting, every gathering, from everything. I wanted to gain power, beauty, and fame. What better way to achieve that than becoming the queen of a kingdom? Yes, I managed a potion that made myself beautiful. But I needed the throne. Only then would I show the other witches. So one day, using my extraordinary power, I lured your mother into the forest. You can probably guess what happened then - all I had to do was strangle her with some enchanted thorny vines. Then, I left the forest and simply convinced everyone about finding your mother a day earlier -”

“You didn’t convince me!” cried out Snow White, indignant.

“Anyhow, during the private chat with your father, I slipped him some tea that had a secret ingredient… a love potion. Immediately, he fell in love with me and decided that the best thing for the kingdom and you was a new queen.”

“But there was still one problem in my way - you. Your father cared about you too much, and we all know that love isn’t the way to handle things. Slowly, I had to cast spells that would make him forget you - that’s why he never objected when I treated you like a servant.”

“And now, I’m about to finish you - give me that sword!”

The Evil Queen started muttering words that enchanted Snow White to obey her every command. The stepdaughter struggled, screaming as she tried to free herself from this mental prison. At last, the Evil Queen managed to make her hand over the sword.

“Time to die…” The Evil Queen smiled crookedly, her eyes without compassion, when suddenly…

Tim the huntsman jumped out of the trees and lunged at the hag. The Evil Queen screamed, and Tim ripped off a necklace that she was wearing. Snow White realised something - the queen always wore that necklace; was it the secret to her life?

Suddenly, the queen started to burn from a fire that had simply come out of nowhere. In the end, all that was left of her was a pile of ashes on the grassy ground.

Snow White gave Tim a huge hug.

“How did you - ?” she began, but he shushed her.

“I had been listening in on her when she was planning to destroy you. I sneaked into her secret chambers and watched. Once she left, I looked at her notebook and found that the necklace was what kept her alive. I knew you were in trouble and could hear you screaming from the forest so I followed the sound.”

“Hey,” Snow White joked, wiping away her tears, “you copied me! Eavesdropping is something I do…” She tried to pout, but instead burst into tears, overwhelmed by everything she had just heard and been through. Tim empathetically gave her a pat on the back.

A day later, the kingdom was informed. The love potion finally wore off Snow White’s father after years, and the Evil Queen’s suite and chambers were destroyed.

Snow White was made queen, and years later, she and Tim were married. A happy ever after indeed… or is it?

I don’t really mind if you like the original story better, but to be quite frank, I love mine more because it shows that women are invulnerable.

Well, thank you for reading this! Remember, I’ll be writing about this every single month. Hmm, are you wondering what's gonna be there next month? Just wait and see!

Written by: Hazel Antler
Edited by: Marietta Oizys
Proofread by: Lily