Peter Pan had just turned 11 years old.  The lost boys started singing Happy Birthday to him, each in his own key and tempo.  The Indians joined in, singing in four-part harmony, with their chief singing in his deepest basso profundo and Princess Tiger Lily adding a descant.  Tinkerbell couldn't sing, but she danced in the air to the rhythm of their singing.  As the song was ending, Peter saw an owl flying towards him.  To his amazement, it dropped an envelope, which floated down towards him, and then it flew back in the direction from which it had come.

Peter ripped opened the envelope and read the letter inside.  It was an invitation to study at the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, together with a list of things to buy and directions how to get there.  Peter was of two minds about whether to accept the invitation.  The prospect of going to school didn't thrill him, but a school of magic might be fun; so he decided he'd give it a try.  He asked Tinkerbell for enough fairy dust to make the return trip and then, on September 1, he flew to Kings Cross Station in London and boarded the Hogwarts Express.

Peter was sorted into Gryffindor.  He took his seat at the Gryffindor table, right beside Harry Potter and Ron Weasley, two first-years who had also just been sorted into Gryffindor.  His tales of Neverland fascinated them, as did his ability to fly without a broom, and he quickly made friends with them.

The courses were interesting enough, except for Astronomy, but when the professors started handing out homework, he decided that any school, even a school of magic, was not for him.  He bade farewell to his new friends and flew back to Neverland.  Harry and Ron occasionally sent him a letter by owl post, telling him about their adventures in and around Hogwarts, and he replied by return mail, telling them about his adventures in Neverland, including his meeting with Wendy Darling and her two little brothers.

Three years later, Peter received a letter from Harry inviting him to attend the Quidditch World Cup match between Ireland and Bulgaria.  He had learned about Quidditch from Harry's letters and was most anxious to see a real match; so he quickly accepted the invitation.  On the day of the match, he flew into the stadium and hunted around for Harry and Ron.  Since he was dressed in green, the spectators thought that he was one of the leprechauns who were rooting for the Irish team.  He found his two friends sitting with a girl, whom Harry and Ron introduced to him as their friend Hermione Granger.  He enjoyed watching the match so much that he decided to reciprocate by inviting the three of them to visit Neverland, and they accepted his invitation.

Upon their arrival in Neverland, Peter introduced his friends to the lost boys.  Harry and Ron took to them immediately, but Hermione had to hide her contempt for anyone who didn't want to go to school.

Next, Peter introduced them to the Indians.  "Their skin is as red as a traffic light," said Ron.  "Are all Indians that colour?"

"No," said Hermione.  "Native Americans, or Indians, as they're called because Christopher Columbus, who sailed to America, thought he was in India, look like Asians because their ancestors came to America from Asia.  Their skin is yellowish-brown, not red."

"Then how did these guys get red skins?" asked Ron.

"Let me tell you," said the Indian Chief.  With that, he and the other Indians sang the song that answers the question "What made the red man red?" and also explains why they say "How?" and "Ugh!".  They sang in four part harmony, with the Chief singing in his usual basso profundo and Princess Tiger Lily singing descant.

"I wish History of Magic was that interesting," said Ron.  "If only you guys were teaching it instead of that boring old ghost, Professor Binns, some of us might actually pay attention."

"What a deep voice you have!" said Hermione to the Indian Chief.  "You reached the B flat below the staff.  You'd make a valuable addition to Professor Flitwick's choir.  They could use a basso profundo like you.  Would you and your friends like to come to Hogwarts and join the choir?"

"Not really," said the Chief.  "We're good here."  And with that, they bade farewell to the three visitors and returned to the forest.

Suddenly Captain Hook and Smee stepped out of their rowboat and rushed at Peter, each of them carrying a sword.  "We've got you outnumbered two to one, and your three friends don't have any weapons," said Captain Hook. "You have two choices: fly away and be called a codfish or die!"

Harry waved his wand at Captain Hook and yelled "Stupefy!", whereupon Captain Hook fell to the ground unconscious.

Then he pointed his wand at Smee and said, "I can do lots more things with this wand.  I can make you do anything I tell you to, I can cause you pain and I can even kill you.  If you don't want me to do any of those things to you, take your captain into your rowboat, row away from Neverland and never come back."

"I'm not strong enough to carry him," said a terrified Smee.

"We'll help you," said Harry.  Harry, Ron and Hermione simultaneously cast the Levitation Charm on the unconscious Captain Hook and lifted him into the rowboat.  Smee ran into the boat and rowed away for all he was worth.

"Thanks a lot," said Peter.  "How did you do those tricks?"

"We learned them in Hogwarts," answered Harry.  "We learn all kinds of magical tricks there.  Are you sure you don't want to come and study magic with us?"

"Nope," said Peter.  "Without Captain Hook around to bother me, I don't need to learn any more magic than I already know.  I'm good here, thanks to you."

Just then Tinkerbell arrived on the scene.  She took one look at Hermione and started turning red and green alternately like a traffic light.  "She did that the last time a girl came here," said Peter, "and she got the lost boys to shoot stones at her.  I have no idea what gets into her when she sees a girl."

Ron and Harry were as clueless as Peter about Tinkerbell's sudden outburst of temper, but Hermione understood immediately what was bothering the little fairy.  There was only one way for Hermione to calm Tinkerbell down.  Hermione had a secret crush on Ron.  She had never divulged her feelings for him for fear of scaring him away, but the occasion demanded that she do so now.  She threw her arms around Ron and kissed him on the lips.  With that, Tinkerbell turned back into her usual colour - bright canary yellow - and flew away.  "Don't you understand, Peter?" said Hermione.  "Tinkerbell is in love with you and she sees any other girl you meet as a possible rival."

"What's love?" asked Peter.

"That's when you like someone so much that you want to spend your whole life with them," answered Hermione.

"Adult stuff!" scoffed Peter.  "I don't want that!"

Ron, who had never been kissed before, explained to Peter how wonderful it feels to be kissed by a girl.

"Now that's something I could go for!" said Peter.  "But Tink is much too small and there are no lost girls around here, only lost boys.  The only girl around here is Tiger Lily, but if I kiss her, Tink'll get mad at her, not to mention what Mr. Basso Profundo might do to me!"

"There are lots of girls in Hogwarts," said Hermione, "and some of them will certainly go for a boy who can fly without a broom.  I'm sure they'll let you study there even though you're three years older than the other first-years."

"Well, I guess it'll be worth doing homework if it means getting to kiss girls," said Peter.

Peter returned to Hogwarts the following September.  He had to start in first year, but he hung around the fourth-year girls.  As Hermione had predicted, lots of them were glad to kiss him.  Lavender Brown was the most aggressive of them; so the two of them soon became an item, as did Ron and Hermione.

A year after Lavender graduated from Hogwarts, Peter got the results of his OWL exams: he had managed to get only three OWLs, an A in Charms and Potions and an E in Defense Against the Dark Arts.  That made him ineligible to take any subjects at the NEWT level except Defense Against the Dark Arts, but he had meanwhile developed another talent - as a writer of children's stories.  His first novel, based on his adventures in Neverland, had sold so well that he was able to sell the movie rights to Universal Studios.  Once the deal was made, he felt confident enough to propose marriage to Lavender.

"It'd be great to be married to you," answered Lavender, "but not if you're going to spend two months a year in Neverland, leaving me to look after our kids all by myself."

"I'd love to live here with you all the time," said Peter, "but if I don't spend at least two months a year in Neverland, Tinkerbell won't give me any more fairy dust.  When my supply runs out, I won't be able to fly any more, and then you'll stop loving me."

"No I won't, now that I've come to know you," said Lavender.  "Is it a deal?"

Peter nodded and they kissed on it.  She had told him part of the truth.  She wouldn't stop loving him, not only because she had come to know him, but also because he had passed the test she had set for him: he hadn't chickened out when she mentioned the terrifying prospect of fatherhood, showing her that he had finally grown up.