Looking for feed back

written by Alice

Hello! I'm looking for feedback on my writing I'm to nervous to show it to people I know personally so this is my alternative! Enjoy

Last Updated

05/31/21

Chapters

3

Reads

382

This one is ok I made it in a time crunch but I still think its good

Chapter 2
At first Alice was scared I mean of course she was, she was alone in the woods with two complete strangers, who looked like they could be marauders or even spys for Mal! As she was thinking of the terrible things that they could be the boy spoke, “Um… thanks” Alice started now that they were away from the harsh lights of the fires she got a better look at the duo. The boy was tall and lean with raven black hair and brown eyes that were not as unkind as Alice had expected, he had broad shoulders and a short ponytail. The girl was slightly shorter than him, she had short shaggy brown hair that didn't even reach her shoulders and brown eyes that seemed as if they could see right through Alice. “Who are you?” Alice said in a timid voice. the girl sighed “Don't worry little girl we aren't here to hurt you” she sounded like she got that reaction a lot “Hey i'm not little i'm fifteen and you didn't answer my question!” Alice said in an annoyed tone. “ Oh my god you’re fifteen?! Holy shit that's hilarious!” the girl was laughing Alice was pissed and yet her worries had been eased what spys or marauders would laugh and poke fun at their prey? The girl regained some control over herself and looked back at Alice “Whew, anyway I'm Evern and that's J.J”.


I'm still going to be adding more to this book so stay tuned if you like my writing
Hogwarts is Here © 2024
HogwartsIsHere.com was made for fans, by fans, and is not endorsed or supported directly or indirectly with Warner Bros. Entertainment, JK Rowling, Wizarding World Digital, or any of the official Harry Potter trademark/right holders.
Powered by minervaa