Peregrin Tugwood's Guide To Looking Great (and Feeling Fine)

Peregrin Tugwood was the great nephew of Sacharissa Tugwood, who pioneered cosmetic and beautifying potions in the late nineteenth and early twentieth centuries. While following his great aunt's approach to beauty, Peregrin was known to take a more holistic approach to the concept, also concentrating on muscle definition, stress-free demeanor, quick wit, and memory. Tugwood's Guide to Looking Great! (And Feeling Fine) was first published in 1965, but quickly had multiple re-printings. It appears here in its most recent publication from 1993, and includes any corrections or additions to the original recipes.

Last Updated

05/31/21

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Adipocytic Potion

Chapter 7

Adipocytic Potion



Estimated Brewing Time:
9 hours and 50 minutes

Total Brewing Time:
45 hours and 50 minutes

Ingredients:
250ml shrake oil1
1 frozen ashwinder egg1
500ml water
10 grains of Merovingian jumping rice2
4 boomslang fangs1
30ml lemon juice1
15ml armadillo bile1
5 coffee beans2
2 rhubarb stalks2
4 raspberry leaves3
2 peach pits3

Instructions:



Part 1:



  1. Add 250ml of shrake oil and bring
    the temperature to 378 Kelvin (105°C/221°F).
  2. Add 1 frozen ashwinder egg.
  3. Increase the heat to 393 Kelvin
    (120°C/248°F) and stir 4 times counter-clockwise.
  4. Let the potion brew for about 4
    minutes.
  5. Reduce back to 378 Kelvin
    (105°C/221°F) and stir thrice clockwise.
  6. Let the potion brew for 23
    minutes.

Dark grey; pale yellow; rotten egg


Part 2:



  1. Add 250ml water to the cauldron.
  2. Add 10 grains of Merovingian
    jumping rice and 4 boomslang fangs to the mortar and crush to an even
    powder.
  3. Add 1tb of the crushed mixture to
    the cauldron and retain the rest.
  4. Add 15ml of lemon juice to the
    mortar and mix to an even paste. Stir the paste once counter-clockwise,
    and put to the side.
  5. Add 15ml of armadillo bile to the
    cauldron.
  6. Stir twice clockwise.
  7. Let the potion brew for 53
    minutes.

Tan; mustard yellow (gold sparks); spicy peppers


Part 3:



  1. Add matured paste of Merovingian
    jumping rice, boomslang fangs, and lemon juice to the cauldron.
  2. Remove the cauldron from the heat
    source 30 seconds after adding the paste, and stir twice clockwise.
  3. Let the potion sit for 7 hours.

Brownish-purple; golden; spicy and citrusy


Part 4:



  1. Add the potion to the heat source
    again and bring to 378 Kelvin (105°C/221°F).
  2. Add 5 coffee beans to the potion.
  3. Increase the heat to 393 Kelvin
    (120°C/248°F) and let it bubble for 4 minutes.
  4. Take the rhubarb stalks and chop
    them finely.
  5. Reduce heat to 378 Kelvin
    (105°C/221°F).
  6. Add chopped rhubarb stalks to the
    cauldron.
  7. Add 4 raspberry leaves to the
    cauldron.
  8. Stir twice counter-clockwise.
  9. Let the potion brew for 43
    minutes.

Violet; light green; cinnamon and cloves


Part 5:



  1. Add 250ml of water to the
    cauldron.
  2. Add 1 peach pit to the cauldron
    and stir once counter-clockwise.
  3. Add 15ml lemon juice to the
    cauldron.
  4. Increase the heat to 393 Kelvin
    (120°C/248°F) and stir twice clockwise.
  5. Add 1 peace pit to the cauldron.
  6. Reduce heat to 378 Kelvin
    (105°C/221°F).
  7. Let the potion brew for 23
    minutes.

Pale purple with dark blue streaks; bright green
(gold sparks); raspberry and clementine


Maturation Notes:



The potion should mature for 36 hours before use.
The potion should mature in direct sunlight with a strong heat source.


To Store:



The potion should be stored in a dark place of
moderate room temperature. The potion can be stored for up to 2 weeks. However,
if the oil begins separating and rising to the top, it should be discarded.



To Use:



The adipocytic potion should only be prescribed
by an advanced Healer specializing in dietary potions. To use, 5 droplets of
the potion should be taken either directly on the tongue or in a high-citrus
juice. It tastes a bit like mango and musty chocolate on its own. It should only be taken once every five days, with weekly visits to
prescribing Healer.


Two days after the first dose, the user will
begin to lose weight. Side effects include bad cramping, muscle spasms,
increased heart rate, and difficulty breathing. Some experience hot flashes,
nausea, vomiting, and stomach ulcers. In rare cases, heart attack and stroke
have occurred.



Caution:



The potion should only be taken under close
watch of an experienced Healer. Improper use of the potion has led to
emaciation, nutrient deficiency, and in some cases starvation.


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